this month has been the hardest month of my entire life. not gonna lie my self-confidence is fucking shot. i feel like im in high school again, cause thats what my self-confidence was like.
i've lost so much motivation in so much of me.
im most happy when im hanging out with my friends. i forget about how i feel and just laugh cause i know its the best thing for me right now. but as before i was able to be by myself and be comfortable, i can't now. i feel so much lonelier now and it sucks. i was always so good at doing things alone before and now i can't say the same anymore.
i've continued to have really great friends in nj, and gained so many in long island. john has been an amazing person to me and if it wasn't for him i don't know if i would have gotten out of bed in this month.
it really fucking sucks that bad things happen to good people and now i understand that statement so much now. i just gotta keep busy. keep me busy.
the mornings are always the worst when i wake up.
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